Talking to Kids about Suicide: A Step-by-Step Guide

The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention indicates that 49,476 people died by suicide, yet 94% of adults think we can prevent many of these cases. 

Suicide prevention starts with a conversation. Our guide will delve into how to talk to kids about suicide so you can support them during trying times. Gain the resources you need to broach conversations about suicide and embark on a journey of healing. 

In This Article

• Warning Signs of Suicide
• Understanding the Importance of Conversation
  • Children’s Discomfort 
  • Parental Uncertainty
• 7 Tips on How to Talk to Teens About Suicide
  • Educate Yourself 
  • Choose the Right Time
  • Engage in Active Listening
  • Acknowledge Feelings
  • Offer Comfort
  • Resist the Urge to Resolve Issues
  • Seek Professional Help
• Take the First Step in Your Healing Journey at Hillside®

Warning Signs of Suicide

Everyone has a unique perception of the world — as such, suicidal thoughts manifest in different ways. Here are some signs that could indicate suicidal feelings:

• Feeling hopeless or worthless
• Experiencing overwhelming guilt or shame 
• Giving away precious possessions or saying goodbye to loved ones
• Expressing rage or recklessness
• Recent episodes of depression or anxiety 
• Initiating conversations about death 
• Any other extreme behavioral changes

If a child demonstrates one or more of these signs, it’s advisable to initiate a conversation about suicide or seek professional help. Taking early action can help save a life.

Understanding the Importance of Conversation

Conversations allow us to hold space for children contemplating suicide. By gaining a deeper understanding of their feelings, we are more equipped to assist them on their mental health journey. Set the stage for healthy conversations by considering some common barriers. 

Children’s Discomfort 

Discussing subjects like the weather or what was on the lunch menu may be easy — conversations about suicide are not that straightforward. If a child demonstrates feelings of unease, it’s best to acknowledge their apprehension from the onset. 

Validate the child by confirming that these conversations are challenging yet necessary to overcome life’s hurdles. Relaying a similar experience may help them to gain further confidence. 

Parental Uncertainty

Parents are humans — and that means they don’t always say the right thing at the appropriate time. However, caregivers who bring up challenging topics lay a foundation for proactive conversations.

Take a listening approach to these conversations. If you don’t know how to answer a question, be honest. Acknowledging that you don’t know the answer at present but will seek a professional response is a helpful answer. 

7 Tips on How to Talk to Teens About Suicide

While it’s understandable that talking to your kids about suicide is necessary, it’s still a challenging conversation. Here are some insights to understand the importance of talking about suicide and some tips to make broaching the subject a bit easier:

1. Educate Yourself 

Before talking to kids about suicide, take the time to gain the knowledge you need to answer their questions. Some resources at your disposal include: 

• Online resources: Associations such as the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention and the National Alliance on Mental Illnesses offer many professionally-backed resources. Gaining a comprehensive understanding of mental health illnesses helps you offer your children better support. 
• Support groups: Caregivers in similar situations with their kids can offer some helpful insights. Sharing experiences can give you the guidance you need to support your children through mental health challenges. 
• Consult with professionals: If you’re unsure about how to proceed with supporting your child, speak with a qualified professional. They can suggest some resources to move forward. 

2. Choose the Right Time

People of all ages can feel overstimulated in loud, crowded spaces. Choose a quiet space with minimal distractions if you need to talk with young kids about suicide.

The holidays, exam season or right before bed can also be stressful times. Be mindful of external stressors when imitating conversations about suicide so children can express their thoughts freely. 

3. Engage in Active Listening

In a technology-driven world, active listening can feel like an enigma. However, it is something we all need to strive toward. Active listening involves: 

• Eye contact: Maintaining occasional eye contact reinforces that you are present and listening. 
• Clarify: Our subjective reasoning means we don’t always understand another person’s perspectives. Asking clarifying questions helps establish true feelings. 
• Reflect: Taking time to reflect after discussions helps you provide better advice. It also helps to limit any judgment seeping into your responses.

4. Acknowledge Feelings

Our natural instinct may be to take away unpleasant feelings — but this will not resolve the issue. Instead, give the young person the space to express their feelings and uncover the meaning behind them. Use open-ended questions to understand their specific thoughts. 

People from all cultures and socioeconomic statuses may experience suicidal thoughts. Instead of passing judgment, recognize that they are entitled to their feelings no matter their circumstances. 

5. Offer Comfort

While a kind word or hug may not solve life’s issues, it does help people to feel at ease. Offer reassurance to the child and show genuine concern if they express suicidal thoughts. 

Resist the urge to give false hope by using blanket statements such as “It’s not so bad” or “Everything will be OK.” Rather focus on bringing comfort by offering actionable advice and following up periodically. 

6. Resist the Urge to Resolve Issues

A parent’s first response is often to fix their child’s problems. However, there are often areas of growth in allowing children to uncover solutions on their own. 

Be mindful of what you say, and try not to instigate feelings of shame during discussions. Remember that it can be challenging to bring suicidal thoughts into the open — be patient with children and allow them time to articulate their feelings. 

7. Seek Professional Help

Caregivers who show compassion to suicidal young people can help them embark on healing journeys. However, there is no replacement for professional support. 

Encouraging a young person to enter a day treatment therapy session or an in-home therapy program can help the child or teen develop the skills they need to cope with suicidal feelings. Assist them in taking this step by helping them find a reliable facility and offering to accompany them in their initial appointment. If you’re in need of immediate support, get in touch with the following professionals: 

• Contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
• Text “HELLO” to the crises line at 741741

Take the First Step in Your Healing Journey at Hillside®

It’s not easy to strike up a conversation about mental health — but talking to young kids about suicide is crucial. Use these tips to help facilitate challenging conversations and seek professional help when necessary. 

Hillside®, Inc. offers specialized behavioral treatment and education to children and their families. Our variety of programs makes it easy for those experiencing suicidal thoughts to get the support they need in the comfort of their own home. Schedule a call with our team today to take the first step!